One of the things I've realized here is that I have issues about being seen as the "poor mother." Sending him to school in pants with holes at the knees is a real trigger. Not sending in materials that the teacher requested is another.
I think this existed in the US - I always tried to keep his clothes new, showered him with too many toys - but I didn't really realize it. I was able to defend against it, but here I've had to really face it.
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